mentally disturbed.

honestly speaking,
ak x berada dlm keadaan yg baek in dis couple of weeks.
smpykn ad satu ari yg ak duk diam jep dlm klas to the point where my english teacher was puzzled at my silence dat day.
felt lyke my head is being spun round and round and round
jumbled up everythin inside it
like a big boggle dat i used to play at skool back in the days
it's odd.
VERY odd.
how can u feel happy and at the same time, feel a huge amount of guilt being put upon ur shoulders?
could there be a situation where one understands too much that it makes him/her unable to produce the same understanding for other things afterwards?

i often shudder deep down inside from the sight
of
my awkwardness
my averageness
my weakness
my gullibility
and
my ignorance.